Mslexia

Why did you become a writer?

I always knew I’d be a writer. Even though there were no writers in the family, I had this blithe childish confidence about it. It seemed so natural and easy, I was sure it was what I was going to do. I was just so full of words: reading all the time and writing poetry and diaries and short stories. Then, when I was a teenager, I just stopped – I became too self-conscious I suppose. And I didn’t start writing properly again until I was 30.

How did you start?

I read English Literature at Oxford, then did some teaching, and working with disturbed children, and at some point I began sending out book reviews. Then I started the magazine Women’s Review and that took over my life for a while. Yes, I know arts journalism is ‘writing,' but it feels completely different to writing creatively. John Updike called it ‘hugging the shore,' and that’s exactly what I was doing.

...underneath it all, I still had the feeling that I should really be writing creatively.

Then my marriage collapsed, and in a strange way that was the making of me. I was a single mother with two little children and everything felt very raw and messy, but it stopped me being so scared of being humiliated, and I started writing better as a journalist. Then the Literary Editor of the New Statesmen left and I was invited to apply for his job. From there I went to the Observer and eventually became executive editor. But underneath it all, I still had the feeling that I should really be writing creatively.

Then I met Sean and we decided to try writing a book together. He already had an agent, so I never had to send out a manuscript or read a rejection letter. It was all very – well, lucky, I suppose.

What was your darkest hour?

I have recurrent darkest hours, when I just stop being able to write and can’t believe I’ll ever produce anything worthwhile ever again. It’s like a panic attack, a gale blowing through me, or an abyss opening up; I feel literally sick and empty. It only ever happens when I’m writing as Nicci Gerrard – being Nicci French lets me dodge all that angst somehow. Running helps me get through it, and looking at art.

How do you go about writing a novel?

I hate the beginning of a novel, when it’s like a cloud gradually gathering and taking shape, before it becomes a book in my head. I carry a notebook and make lots of notes, but it’s always such a jumble. Then I’ll start writing and find I’ve set off in the wrong direction, or I’ll hit an absolute blank wall and have to find a way round it. When I’m writing as Nicci French it’s a bit different, because they’re thrillers, so the plot’s more important. We have to use a synopsis, because we take it in turns, one chapter each, so you can’t just go off at a tangent. But it’s still a journey and you can still find yourself in unexpected places.

Can you talk us through a typical writing day?

My day revolves around my youngest daughter, who’s at sixth-form college. So I get up at around six to sort out her packed lunch, then I’ll go for a run or a swim and eventually sit down at my desk at nine. If I don’t exercise every day I feel stale and itchy and unclean. It’s the same with writing. I’m very puritan about it and I work very hard.

I’ve got an enormous ‘room of my own’ but I don’t really use it at the moment. My other three children are at university now and there are all these empty rooms, so I just carry my laptop from room to room, or into the conservatory, or the kitchen. Then I put some music on, and let it play over and over on a loop: always some kind of melancholic droning ballad, Neil Young, Leonard Cohen, Lucinda Williams, that sort of thing.

I tend to work from nine to five, but there’s nearly always something else happening to interrupt me – some soup on the go, or phonecalls to make, visitors, admin. I love being interrupted; going on a writer’s retreat is my idea of hell. But coffee, I have to have coffee. Or tea. Every hour at least.

Is writing a joy or a torment?

The writing itself has always been a joy. It’s the things surrounding it that are sometimes a torment: the days when I think I can’t do it; the muddle of ideas before they cohere into a book. And I dread it when a book comes out and it’s not a private thing any more, when I have to be this author person – instead of just me tapping away at home on my laptop.

Looking back, what would you have done differently?

I wish I’d studied languages instead of literature. Because I would have read all those books anyway…

What are your three top tips for first-time novelists?

Read.
Write.
Be dogged and determined.

« Previous interview | Next interview »